Just this past week, Sectary of State Hilary Clinton visited India (#myhomeland) to discuss alternative energy options to decrease their dependence on foreign oil from Iran. Iran exports about 9% of India’s oil. They’ve also recently worked an agreement to trade with rupees and Iran will make the difference by seeing what goods they want to get from India. To me this seems fair. Hil-dawg went to over talk to Indian Officials about getting them to cut back so Iran will reveal the details of their nuclear programs. She visited the cities of New Delhi & Kolkata (#Calcutta) and took in the sights and spoke with officials, all done while wearing pant suits.
Every time I hear an American official is going to India to meet with the Officials there, I get concerned. I instantly turn into a teenager when I would have my friends over. The phrase “Please God, don’t let my mother come up here and try to entertain my friends” And as if on cue, she’ll come walking up the stairs in a brand new sari with cucumber juice and tomato sandwiches with spices sprinkled on top. So when I heard Hilary was going to India, I just kept repeating “Please guys, be professional. Don’t bring her cucumber juice or show her the brand new Bollywood movie, starring Shah Rukh Kahn (#ourJohnnyDepp), or dancing.” Lo and behold in the interim of her meetings, that’s exactly what we did! See the photo below for reference.
What I find amazing in all this is the fact that Secretary of State, Hilary Clinton wears a pantsuit throughout her whole trip. It is on average 75 to 80 degrees Fahrenheit India. How was she in that heat in those clothes? Couldn’t she have packed a professional sun dress of some sort? My amazement was that she didn’t burst into flames while walking through the city of Calcutta (#thatswhatI’m giongtocallit). That would be a cool thing for us to brag about. “Look Pakistan, we can set dignitaries a blaze. With what you may ask? Weather! What’s that? You have the same climate as us? Well then nuclear arms it is.”
I personally think that Iran should be left to itself. They trade with a lot of other countries including the European Union, who have received a pardon. But India (along with a few other countries) has to take the brunt of the US’ oddball politics? It’s like in High School, when the jocks get to get away with not doing the work and copying off the nerds, but the nerds get in trouble because they are letting the jock copy off them (#memories). Like I said, leave Iran to itself, that’s all they really want, to be left alone. If they do have nuclear arms, they have them for good reason (#Syria, #Egypt, #Palestine, #yougetthegist). It’s not like a whole bunch of other countries don’t have nuclear arms, like India, Pakistan, The United States of America, Russia, just to name a few.
I can’t wait till either Hollywood or Bollywood makes this issue into a movie. If Hollywood gets a hold of this first it can star Ryan Gosling & Johnny Depp as a duo from the states that has to stop the nuclear arms race in the Middle East, while the Secretary of State, played by Catherine Heigl, is talking about diplomacy. If Bollywood gets a hold of it, it doesn’t matter who’s in it, you can rest assured, there will be a song about Nuclear Safety, which will last 7 to 8 minutes and feature a fantastic dance number! Boy, I do hope that Bollywood grabs this idea and just runs with it!
Krish Mohan is a socially conscious, Indian standup comedian and writer who regularly tours the country. He performs at small theaters, bars, comedy clubs, colleges, DIY and house venues. With his quirky attitude, charming personality, and intelligent humor, Krish captivates and engages audiences of all backgrounds, tackling hot button topics like race, religion, war, immigration, while adding an optimistic, philosophical & sociological twist!