Psychology from Pat

Pat Robertson, Giver of the Lord’s Words and Glory Giver of the 700 Club, recently gave his marriage counseling advice to a man on his show that was condoned in the 1600s. Sweet Pat’s advice to a man, whose wife doesn’t respect him and doesn’t talk to him, was to find a loophole in the Christian system or move to Saudi Arabia to beat his wife. Now, I’m not a Christian, but I do feel like there are portions of the Bible that say don’t do that. Again, I could be wrong; maybe I’m not reading between the lines enough.

Pat, a Televangelist begins to tell this man that he should convert to Islam and move to Saudi Arabia to beat his wife. Of course, that’s the only solution there, and we all remember those postcards from Saudi Arabia that say “Come to Saudi Arabia for the heat and oil, stay for the spousal abuse and turbans”.

Further upon that, he proceeds to analyze this man’s wife, basically saying that she has daddy issues that she is taking out this man. I didn’t know that if you had your own TV show, you automatically get your doctorate in psychology. Is that how Dr. Phil got his doctorate in psychology? No wait, I believe Oprah conjured his. I’m not sure where Pat is getting his degree from, because I’m sure even God would go through 3 years of a Masters program before trying to dissect the mind of any female. I would like a TV show where I give out unprofessional medical, marriage and psychological advice to men that need to learn how to speak up. I’ll call it “The Doctor 701 Club” (#priceisright, #suckitpatrobertson).

Robertson moves on to saying that this man needs to find a way to strike his wife, because he can’t divorce her; it’s against the religion. Wait, leaving your wife because neither one of you can stand each other is bad, but having a personal marriage UFC fight is perfectly fine with the bible? I think Sweet Pat needs to delve a little deeper into the book he swears by and find some passages that talk about non-violence and loving thy fellow man (and woman). His advice is very similar to what a caveman or Mike Tyson 5 years ago would give.  “Me man. Man have muscles. Woman cook meat. If say no, I smack with stick. Ugh Ugh Ugh!” If this is the advice Pat Robertson is going to give us, I’d really like to hear from the Monkeys in the Planet of Apes, not the original but the remake! I feel like they may have better advice in this case.

To Pat Robertson: I would love to see your psychology degree that says it’s okay to hit women because they stand up to their timid and passive aggressive husbands. Till I think you should leave the psychoanalysis and marriage counseling to the professionals like Dr. Phil and Dr. Drew. Thank you.