A little while back, I heard something very odd come out of somebody’s mouth; the term “Gayism”. This happened after a show I was on. All 4 Comedians had performed the show as closing out. A good friend of mine and I stepped outside and this gentleman joined us. To summarize the conversation he looked at us and said “I wasn’t a fan of the Jesus jokes and the Gayism in the show. In fact I’m getting real sick of the Gayism these days.” What the hell is Gayism?

This gentleman was talking about Gayism like it’s a huge movement he and only he has been seeing. As if it was some sort of homoerotic conspiracy theory. Like it’s the political party of Homosexuality that’s starting in 2013! They’re looking to change the national anthem to anything by Queen or Elton John. They run campaign ads only in yogurt shops and uppity thrift stores. Their main goal is to turn the White House is to the Fab House, the House of Representatives into the House of “Bitch Please”, but the Senate’s fine as is. They are getting ready to put their first Gay President into office by 2020. The nominees are Menudo, Ian McKellan and anyone who’s played Hamlet in the last 5 years. I think those are all the base level stereotypes I can think of about the Gays.

Let’s be honest, it took about 30 years after the Civil Rights Movement of the 60s for the U.S. to elect a Black President, it’ll take another 50 for this country to be OK with a Gay President. Obama is only half black anyway, there wasn’t even a full commitment to a Black President. If it ever does come down to it, the country would probably be more likely to elect a Bisexual nominee to lead into a Gay or Lesbian nominee. Frankly, I’d like to see what would happen if we picked the Flamboyant Gay Man to run for President. The Gayism Guy’s head would probably explode if that happened!